BABY MERCHANT CHORDS AND LYRICS

Like many of us, I saw “Baby Merchant” from Cop Rock featured on “Last Week Tonight” and was immediately enthralled. I chorded it out! It’s waiting on approval at Ultimate Guitar, but in the mean time: chords!

This is an acoustic version of “Baby Merchant”; to simplify the chords or make them more ukulele-friendly:
1.) transpose down one half step into Dm and use a capo on the first fret to raise the key back to Ebm (or D#m, depending on how your brainmeats look at the neck!)
OR
2.) transpose up one half step to play it in Em (it won’t sound the same as the track, but you can absolutely still get your “Baby Merchant” on to it!

This is all just my best approximation from listening to it; if you think a different chord sounds better in a spot, go for it!
I put all three keys below if you don’t have a transposer.

Baby Merchant
Cop Rock
Key: Ebm (original key)


[Intro]
[Ebm] [Gb] [Ab]
[Ebm] [Gb] [Ab]
[Ebm] [Gb] [Ab]
[Ebm] [Gb] [Ab]


[Verse 1]
[Ebm]When you’re shopping for a [Gb]dream come [Ab]true
[Ebm]A little package in a [Gb]pink or [Ab]blue 
[Ebm]All depends on who you’re [Gb]talking [Ab]to
Now don’t you [Ebm]worry ‘bout a [Gb]thing
Cause you [Db]know I got the goods for [Ebm]you (yeah) [Gb] [Ab]

[Ebm]The city gives you such a [Gb]run-a[Ab]round
[Ebm]Those pencil pushes only [Gb]put you [Ab]down
[Ebm]But lawyers ain’t the only [Gb]game in [Ab]town
That’s a [Ebm]migraine and a [Gb]half 
I won’t [Db]put you through 

[Chorus]
I’m the [Ebm]Baby [Gb]Merchant, [Db]Tots-R-[Ab]Us
I give you [Ebm]all the [Gb]service with [Db]no damn [Ab]fuss 
Give the [Ebm]Baby [Gb]Merchant [Db]just a week or [Bbm7]two
[Ab] I’ll have your baby for [Ebm]you  [Gb] [Ab]

[Ebm] Oo-woo-[Gb]oo-oo, yeah[Ab]

[Verse 2]
[Ebm]I always got a good [Gb]supply at [Ab]hand 
[Ebm]Deliver anything that [Gb]you de[Ab]mand
[Ebm]A piece of heaven for [Gb]eleven [Ab]grand
That's a [Ebm]small price to [Gb]pay
For a [Db]toddler today[Ebm] [Gb] [Ab]

[Ebm]It ain't a question of [Gb]morali[Ab]ty
[Ebm]I'm not concerned with any [Gb]trumped-up ille[Ab]gality
[Ebm]We're just on big happy [Gb]fami[Ab]ly
It's a [Ebm]pleasure doing [Gb]business
The A[Db]merican Way

[Chorus]
I’m the [Ebm]Baby [Gb]Merchant, [Db]Tots-R-[Ab]Us
I give you [Ebm]all the [Gb]service with [Db]no damn [Ab]fuss 
Give the [Ebm]Baby [Gb]Merchant [Db]just a week or [Bbm7]two
[Ab] I’ll have your baby for [Ebm]you  [Gb] [Ab]

[Bridge]
[Gb]Picture yourself in your [Ab]house with a new son or [Ebm]daughter
[Gb]No one at all has to [Ab]know
That the parents who [Bb]brought her up [C]bought her

[Chorus]
From the [Ebm]Baby [Gb]Merchant, [Db]Tots-R-[Ab]Us
I give you [Ebm]all the [Gb]service with [Db]no damn [Ab]fuss 
Give the [Ebm]Baby [Gb]Merchant [Db]just a week or [Bbm7]two
[Ab] I’ll have your baby 

[Ab] I'll have your baby for [Ebm]you [Gb] [Ab]

[Ab] I'll have your baby for [Ebm]you
Baby Merchant
Cop Rock
Key: Dm


[Intro]
[Dm] [F] [G]
[Dm] [F] [G]
[Dm] [F] [G]
[Dm] [F] [G]

[Verse 1]
[Dm]When you’re shopping for a [F]dream come [G]true
[Dm]A little package in a [F]pink or [G]blue 
[Dm]All depends on who you’re [F]talking [G]to
Now don’t you [Dm]worry ‘bout a [F]thing
Cause you [C]know I got the goods for [Dm]you (yeah) [F] [G]

[Dm]The city gives you such a [F]run-a[G]round
[Dm]Those pencil pushes only [F]put you [G]down
[Dm]But lawyers ain’t the only [F]game in [G]town
That’s a [Dm]migraine and a [F]half 
I won’t [C]put you through 

[Chorus]
I’m the [Dm]Baby [F]Merchant, [C]Tots-R-[G]Us
I give you [Dm]all the [F]service with [C]no damn [G]fuss 
Give the [Dm]Baby [F]Merchant [C]just a week or [Am7]two
[G] I’ll have your baby for [Dm]you  [F] [G]

[Dm] Oo-woo-[F]oo-oo, yeah[G]

[Verse 2]
[Dm]I always got a good [F]supply at [G]hand 
[Dm]Deliver anything that [F]you de[G]mand
[Dm]A piece of heaven for [F]eleven [G]grand
That's a [Dm]small price to [F]pay
For a [C]toddler today[Dm] [F] [G]

[Dm]It ain't a question of [F]morali[G]ty
[Dm]I'm not concerned with any [F]trumped-up ille[G]gality
[Dm]We're just on big happy [F]fami[G]ly
It's a [Dm]pleasure doing [F]business
The A[C]merican Way

[Chorus]
I’m the [Dm]Baby [F]Merchant, [C]Tots-R-[G]Us
I give you [Dm]all the [F]service with [C]no damn [G]fuss 
Give the [Dm]Baby [F]Merchant [C]just a week or [Am7]two
[G] I’ll have your baby for [Dm]you  [F] [G]

[Bridge]
[F]Picture yourself in your [G]house with a new son or [Dm]daughter
[F]No one at all has to [G]know
That the parents who [A]brought her up [Bb]bought her

[Chorus]
From the [Dm]Baby [F]Merchant, [C]Tots-R-[G]Us
I give you [Dm]all the [F]service with [C]no damn [G]fuss 
Give the [Dm]Baby [F]Merchant [C]just a week or [Am7]two
[G] I’ll have your baby 

[G] I'll have your baby for [Dm]you [F] [G]

[G] I'll have your baby for [Dm]you
Baby Merchant
Cop Rock
Key: Em

[Intro]
[Em] [G] [A]
[Em] [G] [A]
[Em] [G] [A]
[Em] [G] [A]

[Verse 1]
[Em]When you’re shopping for a [G]dream come [A]true
[Em]A little package in a [G]pink or [A]blue 
[Em]All depends on who you’re [G]talking [A]to
Now don’t you [Em]worry ‘bout a [G]thing
Cause you [D]know I got the goods for [Em]you (yeah) [G] [A]

[Em]The city gives you such a [G]run-a[A]round
[Em]Those pencil pushes only [G]put you [A]down
[Em]But lawyers ain’t the only [G]game in [A]town
That’s a [Em]migraine and a [G]half 
I won’t [D]put you through

[Chorus]
I’m the [Em]Baby [G]Merchant, [D]Tots-R-[A]Us
I give you [Em]all the [G]service with [D]no damn [A]fuss 
Give the [Em]Baby [G]Merchant [D]just a week or [Bm7]two
[A] I’ll have your baby for [Em]you  [G] [A]

[Em] Oo-woo-[G]oo-oo, yeah[A]

[Verse 2]
[Em]I always got a good [G]supply at [A]hand 
[Em]Deliver anything that [G]you de[A]mand
[Em]A piece of heaven for [G]eleven [A]grand
That's a [Em]small price to [G]pay
For a [D]toddler today[Em] [G] [A]

[Em]It ain't a question of [G]morali[A]ty
[Em]I'm not concerned with any [G]trumped-up ille[A]gality
[Em]We're just on big happy [G]fami[A]ly
It's a [Em]pleasure doing [G]business
The A[D]merican Way

[Chorus]
I’m the [Em]Baby [G]Merchant, [D]Tots-R-[A]Us
I give you [Em]all the [G]service with [D]no damn [A]fuss 
Give the [Em]Baby [G]Merchant [D]just a week or [Bm7]two
[A] I’ll have your baby for [Em]you  [G] [A]

[Bridge]
[G]Picture yourself in your [A]house with a new son or [Em]daughter
[G]No one at all has to [A]know
That the parents who [B]brought her up [C]bought her

[Chorus]
From the [Em]Baby [G]Merchant, [D]Tots-R-[A]Us
I give you [Em]all the [G]service with [D]no damn [A]fuss 
Give the [Em]Baby [G]Merchant [D]just a week or [Bm7]two
[A] I’ll have your baby 

[A] I'll have your baby for [Em]you [G] [A]

[A] I'll have your baby for [Em]you
Original song I wrote about all this after reading “Rage Becomes Her”

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